“faster,” i moaned. “why won’t this page load faster?”
June 2013
is masturbating while smoking weed called masturblazing
no its called highjacking
guys no it’s weedwhacking
the quadratic formula
*war flashbacks*
i want to hug all the sad ppl and make them unsad
i stepped on the scale today and it said “bat”
it took me a few seconds to realize it meant the battery was out, but before i realized that i just said “i am not a bat” out loud
Stay Positive - Inspiring Quotes: Stages Of A Breakup →
staypositive.me
There’s no doubt that breaking up is hard. It can signal the loss of someone really important in your life and it often takes a long time to fully get over it. Here are the main stages of a breakup:
· Shock. Even if you are the one who initiated the breakup and…
when I was like 7 I found my brother’s porn on his computer and it was this story about a girl and she went to this mechanics place but she didn’t have any money so she payed with like sex and then so I thought that was how you paid for everything so once we went to target and I started unbuttoning my pants and my mother started screaming
u can still be thug as hell even if you cry everyday right
yeah i did like 100 push ups today
Remember limewire
Remember sometimes getting the song you were actually looking for and sometimes getting an mp3 of bill clinton saying that he didn’t have sexual relations with that woman instead
one time i got a sample from the tea store at the mall and as i walked away the guy said “tea you later” and then his coworker smacked him
Play
0:28
why be rude when you can be nude
i hate it when i say i hate everyone and then someones like ‘oh except me lol’ ha ha no not except you now you made it to the top of the list well done
hotels can’t be boring to me
they’re just fun
even if i’m sitting in the room watching tv or riding the elevator or sleeping it’s just fun for some reason like they’re average every day things but in a hotel everything is way more amusing and interesting and just simply being in a hotel is fun to me and i don’t understand
some guy just called my number thinking i was a male prostitute, and he started talking to me about how much he could pay me so i pulled up gunshot noises on my computer and started screaming and he panicked and hung up
911 jUST FFUCKING CALLLLED ME IA AMC LAUGHHING SO HARD I TOLD THEM THE SITUEATION AND I’M STULL FUCMKING LAUGHING BECUASE NO W HTE’YRE TRACING THE GUY TO ARREST HIM FOR TRYING TO SOLICITEA ND PAY FOR SEX
I’VE DONE A GOOD
my mom is crying because she killed a ladybug
